NSA Intercepts A Conversation Betweet President Obama and Al Sharpton

   Waterleaks recently sent the transcript of a phone conversation between President Obama and the Reverend Al Sharpton to this website.  The National Security Agency recorded the phone conversation and the decrypted version was intercepted by Waterleaks.  The conversation was recorded at 7:24 p.m. EST on 21 July 2013.  Barack Obama is designated as Obama and Al Sharpton is designated as Sharpton.  The intercept is classified as ” eyes only ” to the Director of the National Security Agency and is labled- NSA:  21JY2013-EyesOnly-Dir-D26-073294. 

Obama: Hello.

Sharpton:  Is it safe to talk on this phone connection?

Obama:  Glad you called Al.  Talk freely, this is a secure line. 

Sharpton:  The demonstrations that you ordered are going very well.  I hope that the honkeys get the message that us folks of color are really upset with the Trayvon killing.

Obama: It is important that you keep stirring things up.  Make sure that Americans view this as a black-white issue.  I have a whole lot of problems and we need to convince everyone that any criticism of me amounts to racism.

Sharpton:  Any criticism of you is motivated by racists in the media and in congress.  I am planning other demonstrations throughout the country to teach these white crakers that us folks of color will not tolerate racism. 

Obama:  I want you to start your demonstrations whenever congress is starting another investigation into my administration. 

Sharpton: We need a lot more brothers in congress.  What are the racist crakers in congress threatening you with this time?

Obama: Well, there is Benghazi where four Americans were murdered.

Sharpton:  How was you supposed to know that Americans was in danger?  Just because you receive intelligence reports daily, and just because you received a three month warning don’t mean this was your fault.  You being persecuted by crackers and honkeys in congress. 

Obama:  Also, the congressional crackers are trying to make a big deal over the Internal Revenue Service matter. 

Sharpton:  Them crackers just pretending like you done something wrong.  How was you to know that conservative organizations was not getting approved for tax exempt status while liberal organizations was?

Obama:  Then there is the problem with Attorney General Eric Holder.  Congress already found him in contempt and they are trying to make a big deal out of our selling weapons to drug dealers in Mexico. 

Sharpton:  If your Attorney General was white, the congressional crackers would never have messed with him.  How you supposed to know that the illegal sale of weapons would end up in the hands of drug dealers and be used to murder an American?

Obama:  Al, sometimes the pressure of being president really begins to get to me.

Sharpton:  Sounds to me that you need a little time for relaxation.  I sure don’t mean playing golf with Tiger Woods, but something like a party might be helpful.

Obama:  You are right Al.  I’ll call Jesse Jackson and Bill Clinton and the four of us can get together with some hot bitches. 

Sharpton:  Now you talking sense Barack.  Where you going to get the bitches from?

Obama:  Bill Clinton and Jesse Jackson are experts in poontang.  Just wait until you see the bitches that they bring.  We can use the secure location in West Virginia.  This will be one great party and I’ll make sure that NSA has all of their devices turned off.  We can’t have problems in that area. 

                                    R. Van Conoley

This entry was posted in Next Year's and Future Headlines Today, Satire and tagged , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply