To: Ms. Eva Stalin-Amin
From: Director of Personnel of The Clinton Foundation; December 7, 2009
Dear Ms. Stalin-Amin,
Congratulations on your joining the Clinton Foundation. Since the Clinton Foundation does not maintain any written documents that could possibly harm Hillary Clinton in any way, you should consider this e-mail as a personal instruction booklet for the Clinton Foundation. Please be advised that the Clinton Foundation collects hundreds of millions of dollars from: 1) International Drug dealers, 2) International Criminal Organizations, 3) Dictators who systematically abuse basic human rights, 4) World leaders who stone to death homosexuals, 5) Countries where women do not have rights, 6) Multinational corporations who will receive special treatment when Hillary becomes President, 7) Corporations who dump toxic wastes into the environment, 8) The International Banking Community, 9) Islamic Jihad Union, 10) Abu Nidal Organization, 11) Abu Sayyaf Group, 12) HAMAS, 13) Hizballah, 14) The Revolutionary Armed Forces of Columbia, 15) The Islamic Movement of Uzbekistan, 16) Ansar-al-Islam, 17) Army of Islam, 18) Boko Haram, 19) ISIL, 20) Al-Shabaab, 21) Members of the Russian Mafia, 22) Armenian Mafia, 23) Uzbek Mafia, and 24) numerous other individuals and organizations.
You may be tempted to believe that many of these donors work against the best interests of the American People. Please remove that thought from your mind because at The Clinton Foundation we believe that the “ends justify the means.” Also, all of the monies collected by the Clinton Foundation will be thoroughly laundered through multiple shell corporations.
Also, for the security of all individuals in The Clinton Foundation, we have located our computer server in Hillary Clinton’s basement so that it is hidden from U.S. Law Enforcement. Now what could possibly go wrong ?